A Gentle Spirit

A gentile spirit is not often observed in our day. Many have harsh spirits displayed openly to all. Do you have a long or a short fuse? It is rare that a person remains gentle every hour of every day. When a believer is harsh and disgruntled it is not because the fruit of the Spirit is not available–it is because he/she is walking in the flesh. You can either walk in the Spirit or walk in the flesh, but you cannot do both at the same time. Have you ever been to Disney World? It is proclaimed as the happiest place on earth! My wife and I were visiting there and observed many families. They were supposed to be happy in this happiest place on earth. While watching those families we discovered that not everyone was happy. Many of them had short fuses. Their wonderful environment did not … [Read more...]

Biblical Counseling Distinctives

What makes Biblical counseling distinct? Is it because a Christian is the one providing the counseling? Or maybe it is defined by the Biblical truth from God's Word. Let's look into the distinctives are learn. There are several instances when the approach of a biblical counselor and a humanist would be the same. Personnel selection is an example. The counselor must make a judgment on how the applicant will respond to the demands of a position. He studies the application form, autobiography, work history, and the interview. Based on this data, the skilled counselor can produce a reasonably accurate description of the applicant and how he will respond to his environment. The humanist and the biblical counselor can work side by side to this point; then we come to a fork in the … [Read more...]

Four Counseling Factors

The four counseling factors are essential when helping others. Dealing with individuals and their needs is more a matter of getting across a message than following a single established method. Each person will follow his own distinctive way and use his own choice of words. Many times it is like kneading dough. It takes effort to make sure the truth penetrates the counselee’s entire thinking, attitudes, and feelings. But even so, the following basic factors are essential in effective counseling: Counseling Factor 1: Be Compassionate To be an effective counselor, you must be a loving, compassionate person. You must love the counselee enough to present him with God’s truth regardless of what the truth may suggest for him. When the rich young ruler came to Jesus and asked what he must do … [Read more...]

Joy Requires God’s Reservoir

Joy does not come from a discouraged soul. Joy requires God's reservoir of help. Our world needs needs a good dose of these virtues: love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Most mental-health workers would agree with that statement. We would, however, sharply disagree on how to generate such virtues. If you were an atheist, your only option would be to find a way to create an environment that will either produce these qualities inside a person or release them from within a person, assuming something is blocking their release. I spoke with a man who wished that he had love, joy, and peace in his home. While the man had great wealth, he realized that he could not find a doctor, counselor, or a retail store where he could buy … [Read more...]

The Heart of the Problem (Anger-part 5 of 5)

The Heart of the Problem is the Problem of the Heart! *This five-part series is an overview of The Heart of the Problem book/workbook. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com/books and go deeper in your discovery. For detailed training as a biblical counselor, see https://thinklifechange.com/our-program/ Dealing with anger is the single greatest issue that comes to the consulting room. Though many deny it to be their problem, many more realize that it is the problem. If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! Anger is One Letter Away from Danger! Have you ever lost your keys? What was your response? Have you … [Read more...]

The Heart of the Problem (part 3 of 5)

The Heart of the Problem is the Problem of the Heart! *This five-part series is an overview of The Heart of the Problem book/workbook. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com/books and go deeper in your discovery. For detailed training as a biblical counselor, see https://thinklifechange.com/our-program/ If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! Using the Bible as a Mirror If the Lord looks at the heart, then it follows that a checkup of your soul should be more critical than an examination of your physical appearance. A checkup of the soul need not take longer than a checkup of one’s personal appearance. Regular … [Read more...]

The Heart of the Problem (part 1 of 5)

The Heart of the Problem is the Problem of the Heart! *This five-part series is an overview of The Heart of the Problem book/workbook. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com/books and go deeper in your discovery. For detailed training as a biblical counselor, see https://thinklifechange.com/our-program/ If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! The Problem of Sin The next five articles will focus on truths found in the book, "The Heart of the Problem." Two words have almost disappeared from the vocabulary of Christians. One of those words is the word sin. The other word is repentance. Many churches and … [Read more...]

Pretending Happiness

Pretending happiness is a tough way to live. It takes a lot of energy to keep up this acting lifestyle. George wanted to clear up the gnawing sense of anxiety and growing unhappiness that plagued him, and hoped to do so before anyone else found out about his condition. So he quietly sought professional counseling. He would rather have died than have his associates learn that he was bored with church and its activities, dissatisfied with his wife, and annoyed with his fellow employees at work. But the counseling experience was a shattering one. The counselor, who George suspected was a non-Christian, pressed him to share his antagonisms, and George did not like it. He insisted he had no antagonisms. He stoutly maintained that since he was a Christian he loved everyone and was nice to … [Read more...]

Understanding The Inner Person

Understanding our inner person can be quite complicated for us. However, God’s invitation is to believe, receive, abide, come, and take of His resources so that we will have a greater understanding of the inner person. Frequently, an individual will protest that he has no will power, that he is weak, or that his case is special. He pleads for understanding, implying that if he were understood, he would be accepted as he is. Of course it is true that all people are weak, unrighteous, and sinful. It is also true that a disturbed individual needs to be understood by others but also by him or herself. But understanding the inner person and his/her problems does not change him/her, it only makes his/her need clear. He needs someone to reassure, instruct, and guide him to Christ who can … [Read more...]

Envy: A Self-Focused Problem

  Envy is a self-focused problem. Many people are not satisfied with who they are. When they look into a mirror, they don't see the real "them," they see what they want to become. This type of envy is harmful to the soul. Proverbs 14:30 states, “A sound heart is life to the body, but envy is rottenness to the bones.” It has been said by Socrates that, “Envy is the ulcer of the soul.” A Danish proverb states, “Rust consumes iron and envy consumes itself.” Another said, “Envy is the art of counting the other fellows blessings instead of your own.” Another words, envy destroys a person from the inside out. Envy happens in the commonality of life. I am not envious of SuperBowl champion quarterback, Drew Brees. Why? Because it is impossible for me to attain his ability in … [Read more...]

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