Biblical Counseling

Waiting on God

June 18, 2017 | 0 Comments

Waiting on God can be a refreshing or a frustrating time–according to how you face the moment! “But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength…”  Isaiah 40:31 (NKJV) Do you enjoy waiting in a long line to make a purchase? Of course not, you want to pay for your product and move on to the next task awaiting you. Spiritually, we sometimes have to stand in a long line, waiting our turn to receive our next assignment, virtue, correction, or instruction. But, waiting requires patience and patience requires perseverance and perseverance requires godliness. According to Scripture, when you wait on the Lord, you get stronger. The person who walks in a love relationship with God finds strength in waiting with Him. So much is learned about life during this meditative time. God has designed just the right amount of waiting time so that what happens in your life is exactly on His time table. This time of waiting is when you should GAIN strength, not lose strength! In Isaiah 40:31, the prophet says, “But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk […] Read More

Can You Live Up to Them?–Biblical Standards

May 29, 2017 | 2 Comments

Biblical Standards Can you live up to biblical standards? Of course in our own human strength we fall far short. But, think about the standards you hold and find out if they are your own personal standards or biblical standards. Here are some standard questions that biblical counselors ask people who come to see them. • Do you go to church regularly? • Do you read the Bible regularly? • Do you pray regularly? Many answer yes to all of these. What could be wrong? It is not what they prayed about; it is what they do not pray about. It is not what they read in the Bible; it is what they do not read in the Bible. The problem is not whether they attend church. It is whether they worship when they get there! If you read the Bible and pray every day–that you will keep out of trouble is not a valid assumption. These can be rituals. Two men went up to the temple to pray. One said, “God, look at me! Is it not wonderful that You have me?” The other one said, “God, be merciful to me a sinner!” They both went to the temple to […] Read More

Feelings Can Really Hurt!

May 15, 2017 | 1 Comment

Feelings can really hurt! I hear that statement often. But just what does that really mean? Autonomic Nervous System There are certain emotional centers in the brain that are linked to the entire body through the autonomic nervous system. This system can be compared to the wires that carry electricity from a main power source to all the outlets in your house. Charges of emotions are relayed from the brain, down the spinal cord, and through the autonomic nerves to the blood vessels, muscle tissues, mucous membranes, and skin. So when you are under emotional stress, all parts of your body can be subject to physical discomfort because of a change in blood nourishment, glandular function, or muscle tone. For example, a speaker who is about to be introduced before a crowd oftentimes is fearful over facing the audience. Suddenly his mouth will become dry. That’s because his blood vessels have constricted and glandular activity has reduced. When the fear goes away, the dryness will also go away. It has also been proven that emotional stress will increase the size of the blood vessels in your head; this, in turn, produces pain because of the stretching of the tissues around […] Read More

Two Kinds of Patience

May 8, 2017 | 0 Comments

There are two basic kinds of patience, active and inactive patience. Inactive patience simply waits on things to happen. Inactive patience thinks, “Well I hope it all works out.” It is like a prisoner waiting out time in a jail cell. “I’m not going to try to escape. I’m not going to try to redeem myself. I’m not going to try to talk to an attorney, even though I may have been put in here unjustly, I’m just going to wait it out.” Active patience is like a soldier whose focus is victory. He is systematically working toward victory. This person endures all the difficulties that are required to capture the situation. Whatever it takes to accomplish the task, active patience will pursue. This active patience gets the job done. Have you ever heard this statement: “Well I’m just waiting on the Lord.” That phrase can be used with either kind of patience. It can be an inactive patience, “I’m just going to sit on my front porch and do nothing, slowly. I will wait, hoping something happens.” But you see waiting on God is not inactivity. Waiting on God is pursuing the last thing He told you to do […] Read More

What is My Problem?

May 1, 2017 | 0 Comments

What is my problem? I hear this question asked over and over by sincere people looking for solutions to difficulties in life. Most often the issue is about overcoming anxiety, stress, and frustration. Let’s first set the context by considering this passage from Proverbs: Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh, and strength to your bones. (Prov. 3:7-8). One of our responsibilities as Christians is to be witnesses to weary travelers who are trying to use human resources to deal with sin. The collapse of family life and the escalation of dishonesty, stealing, violence, crime, physical and sexual abuse speaks for itself. Our world needs a good dose of love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Solutions Many in our day wonder whether their problem can be solved by spending time in the solitude of some peaceful place or whether they must see their doctor for medical help. Christian’s minds are confused by the constant magazine articles, newspaper clippings, and news reports that claim a cure to the monotony of life. They wonder whether their problem is physical, emotional, or spiritual. Where […] Read More

A Gentle Spirit

April 10, 2017 | 0 Comments

A gentile spirit is not often observed in our day. Many have harsh spirits displayed openly to all. Do you have a long or a short fuse? It is rare that a person remains gentle every hour of every day. When a believer is harsh and disgruntled it is not because the fruit of the Spirit is not available–it is because he/she is walking in the flesh. You can either walk in the Spirit or walk in the flesh, but you cannot do both at the same time. Have you ever been to Disney World? It is proclaimed as the happiest place on earth! My wife and I were visiting there and observed many families. They were supposed to be happy in this happiest place on earth. While watching those families we discovered that not everyone was happy. Many of them had short fuses. Their wonderful environment did not seem to have a positive effect on their negative spirit. Obvious problems in the visiting families of the happiest place on earth needed to be addressed. Yet, to address a problem does not mean it is a painless experience. Suppose I have a splinter in my hand and I ask you […] Read More

Who Knows the Truth?

April 3, 2017 | 0 Comments

Who knows the truth anyway? How can one determine truth based on information that comes from many different sources? This is a valid question to ask, particularly in 2017! If sin is the problem then proper knowledge of it and how to deal with it is absolutely critical. In 1973, Dr. Carl Menninger wrote a book entitled Whatever Became of Sin? In it he noted that in 1953 (20 years before he wrote the book) President Eisenhower quoted Lincoln as part of his declaration of a day of prayer: It is the duty of nations, as well as of men to own their independence upon the overruling power of God, to confess their sins and transgressions in humble, sorrow, yet with assured hope that genuine repentance will lead to mercy and pardon. Dr. Menninger emphasizes that for the next 20 years presidential declarations have eliminated reference to sin. As a nation, he said, we officially stopped sinning after that declaration. Menninger offers a reasonable explanation for people leaving “sin” out of their vocabulary. At the turn of the century the use of the scientific method led to new theories of behavior and learning. Here are a few of them: Messner demonstrated […] Read More

The Heart of the Problem (Anger-part 5 of 5)

February 27, 2017 | 0 Comments

  Dealing with anger is the single greatest issue that comes to the consulting room. Though many deny it to be their problem, many more realize that it is the problem. *This five-part series is an overview of The Heart of the Problem book/workbook. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com and go deeper in your discovery. If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! Anger is One Letter Away from Danger! Have you ever lost your keys? What was your response? Have you ever been cut off in traffic? What was your response? Is being a little bit angry like being a little bit pregnant? The one single problem that everyone is plagued with universally is anger. But, if there is one topic in which there is universal disagreement, it would be how to tame anger. Most Christians believe their anger is always righteous. However, James says the anger of “man” does not produce righteousness. Anger is sin, and that’s good news! Why? Because, there is a divine solution for sin. Dealing […] Read More

The Heart of the Problem (part 4 of 5-Unforgiveness)

February 20, 2017 | 0 Comments

A major teaching when studying The Heart of the Problem book/workbook is how to deal with unforgiveness. This part four of five in this series will help you in understanding some of the issue involved with unforgiveness. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com and go deeper in your discovery. If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! Dealing with Unforgiveness Forgiveness is a major roadblock in personal relationships. If a person is in bondage to a particular sin, they may keep asking for forgiveness of a particular sin yet they never freed from the sin. Could it be because of an unforgiving spirit? Simon Peter was talking to Jesus and His disciples trying to show how spiritual he was. My paraphrase of Matthew 18:21 is, “Jesus, when it comes to the issue of someone offending us, how many times should we forgive them? Up to seven times?” Peter  thought he was being generous. He seemed to be showing off about how gracious he was and what a forgiving person he was. Jesus said, […] Read More

The Heart of the Problem (part 3 of 5)

February 13, 2017 | 0 Comments

The Heart of the Problem study helps you learn to use God’s Word as a mirror to your soul. This third part will help you to do a checkup of your soul. *This five-part series is an overview of The Heart of the Problem book/workbook. If you discover help in these articles, I encourage you to purchase the workbook at www.kerryskinner.com and go deeper in your discovery. If the article is helpful to you, please forward it to your friends, or post it on facebook, linked in, or twitter. God bless you in your studies! Using the Bible as a Mirror If the Lord looks at the heart, then it follows that a checkup of your soul should be more critical than an examination of your physical appearance. A checkup of the soul need not take longer than a checkup of one’s personal appearance. Regular checkups will serve you well if you correct what needs attention, but often we will go for weeks or months, or even years, without checking up on our hearts. When people come into my consulting room, I can see that they have taken time to look nice. However, what I talk about is the part of them […] Read More

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