Biblical Counseling

Christ’s Help in a Self-Help World

April 23, 2018 | 0 Comments

Christ’s help for us is different than the assistance available from a “self-help” world. No matter what the world tells you, Jesus has a clear, concise, simple promise for His disciples: Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”  John 14:27 The apostle Paul taught: Walk in [live by] the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.”  Gal. 5:16 Everyone has two options in life: turn to God for help or, turn to the world for help. Of course there are common events in life for helping yourself, but remember, spiritual needs come from God, not self. It’s like determining if you are headed north or south. Those are opposite directions. God’s help, and self help are opposites also. Suppose we call heading Godward “north” and looking to the world heading “south.” What help is there if you are headed south? You can turn to psychologically or psychiatrically trained people for help. These disciplines declare by faith that there is no God. We must help ourselves. There is a good deal of help in the […] Read More

How Does the Truth Affect You?

April 2, 2018 | 0 Comments

When you are faced with the truth, how does truth affect you? Christians who have knowingly committed sin and then are corrected in humility will either become mellow or hard hearted when they hear the truth. If you are the one being corrected, you will face the same choice of response. Your response to truth is not determined by the spirit of the person delivering the message. Your reaction to the truth is determined by your spirit. The safest response to needed correction is to change. To delay change may require increased discipline by God to turn your heart back to Him. Jesus said to the church at Laodicea, “So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth” (Rev. 3:16). If you are cold, you know you are cold. If you are hot, you know you are hot. But, if you are lukewarm you hardly know you exist. When a lukewarm person is corrected he/she does not see much need for change. An unrepentant believer is not received well by Jesus. Reproof and correction are helpful but not painless. If you go to the doctor and the exam reveals the […] Read More

Who Do I Love?

March 26, 2018 | 1 Comment

To be in love with somebody is a wonderful experience. I remember the dating experience with  Elaine. I dreamed about that girl! I used to talk about her all the time, and carried her picture in my wallet, and at odd moments, I’d take it out and look at that simple image of her. I had a picture of her in my room (I still have that picture on my iPhone now). Every night that I wasn’t working, I went to see her. I went to see her as often as my parents would let me! I bought gifts for her and did everything I could to show my love for her. While we all enjoy being with our families, we also like to be around various other people. Many times you must pause and ask yourself what comes first, family, time with friends, or to love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind? It is difficult to think more about God than about your family. That’s a particularly big order for young people who are in love with each other. Though my focus is on providing for the love […] Read More

Deceit Can Affect Your Health

March 19, 2018 | 0 Comments

Deceit can affect your health. Deceit is the deliberate attempt to mislead someone. Hypocrisy is the pretended possession of those qualities that would make others believe in one’s sincerity, goodness, and devotion. One of the clearest illustrations of deceit was told to me by my friend and mentor Dr. Henry Brandt. I remember him telling me this story and then we included it in one of our books–The Word for the Wise. I think you will enjoy the story of the Stolen Raspberries! When I was a boy, we lived in the suburbs. A neighbor had a fine raspberry patch. My instructions were to stay out of it unless permission was given by my parents and the people who owned the patch. One day when there was was no one around, I slipped into the patch and started eating the ripe, juicy raspberries. What a pleasure! Suddenly, there was a noise behind me. I turned around and was face-to-face with the owner. Instantly, I was a bundle of tensions. My heart pounded wildly, and I began to sweat. Desperately, I pleaded with the lady not to tell my mother. But she wouldn’t promise. Those berries suddenly felt like a rock […] Read More

Envy: A Self-Focused Problem

March 12, 2018 | 0 Comments

  Envy is a self-focused problem. Many people are not satisfied with who they are. When they look into a mirror, they don’t see the real “them,” they see what they want to become. This type of envy is harmful to the soul. Proverbs 14:30 states, “A sound heart is life to the body, but envy is rottenness to the bones.” It has been said by Socrates that, “Envy is the ulcer of the soul.” A Danish proverb states, “Rust consumes iron and envy consumes itself.” Another said, “Envy is the art of counting the other fellows blessings instead of your own.” Another words, envy destroys a person from the inside out. Envy happens in the commonality of life. I am not envious of SuperBowl champion quarterback, Drew Brees. Why? Because it is impossible for me to attain his ability in football. It is easy to refrain from envy toward people who are far beyond what we can achieve. We tend to be envious toward people who are achieving things that we believe we can accomplish. You might be covetous of Drew Brees’ ability, but envy is probably not the issue. So, how do we prepare for dealing with envy? […] Read More

Does Truth Help or Hurt?

February 26, 2018 | 0 Comments

Does truth help or hurt you? I guess it depends on how you respond to the truth! George wanted to clear up the gnawing sense of anxiety and growing unhappiness that plagued him, and hoped to do so before anyone else found out about his condition. So he quietly sought professional counseling. He would rather have died than have his associates learn that he was bored, with church and its activities, dissatisfied with his wife, and annoyed with his fellow employees at work. But the counseling experience was a shattering one. The counselor, who George suspected was a non-Christian, pressed him to share his antagonisms, and George did not like it. He insisted he had no antagonisms. He stoutly maintained that since he was a Christian he loved everyone and was nice to all. Still the counselor probed, and finally George blew his top. Afterward he was ashamed because he had been a poor example of what a Christian ought to be. The counselor pointed out that George was filled with anger and hatred toward people rather than filled with love. Then George came to see me. He was confused. Was he a Christian or wasn’t he? He had asked […] Read More

Is Worry an Issue for You?

February 19, 2018 | 1 Comment

Do you worry? Is worry an issue for you? Does it give you hang-ups? Does it occupy your time and your mind? Does it keep you from having the peace that you need? Does it keep you from resting when you need to rest? Some people are worried that they might get anxious about something! Christians are not exempt from practicing the fine art of worrying. Even though we should walk in the Spirit so that we do not fulfill the desires of the flesh we still tend to worry about things we cannot control. Someone once said, “It ain’t no use puttin’ up your umbrella till it rains.” Another said, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It will give you something to do but it won’t get you anywhere.” Charles Mayo said, “Worry affects the circulation, heart, the glands, and the whole nervous system. I never met a man that died from overwork but many who died from doubt or worry.” It is not when you are busy that worry infiltrates your mind, it is when you slow down that it becomes evident. People give many reasons for worry. One worry that gives us hangups is the one where […] Read More

The Law of the Spirit of Life in Christ

February 3, 2018 | 0 Comments

For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death. Romans 8:2, NKJV The law of sin pulls us downward. We tend to miss the mark that we set for ourselves. The law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus pulls us upward. The Bible describes the fruit of the Spirit as: Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law (Galatians 5:22-23). You cannot pass a law that forces me to love you—or to have a heart filled with joy. You cannot learn to love by reading a book. You cannot order me to be a peaceful man. You can force me to act like I love you. You can determine how a joyful person should look and require everyone to look that way. Neither can you pass a law that orders me to cease being angry, or hateful, or lustful. You can pass a law that limits the way to behave when I am angry, or hateful, or lustful. You cannot legislate the condition of anyone’s heart. There is a vast difference between a cheerful manner and a […] Read More

What Are the Worst Sins?

December 11, 2017 | 1 Comment

Just what are the worst sins a Christian can commit? Would you say it would be to call someone a liar? Maybe it is for a married person to commit adultery. Or, what about deceiving others? Could it be that the worst of all is to murder someone? We know that all sin is an offense against God. All sin cost God the life of His Son Jesus to provide redemption for a people who could not help themselves. Sin is unquestionably the great reproach against God. But why are there lists of sins in the Bible? Are some worse than others? Are they listed so that we can be more aware of them in our lives? Could you list all the sins in the Bible and then rank them according to what you think are the worst ones, or maybe make a Top Ten list of sins? Of course you could do that. What I find interesting is the groupings of sin problems in the Scriptures. Here are a few that stand out to me: James 3:16-“For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.” Notice that every evil thing is listed with self. Where […] Read More

Two Forms of Patience: Human and Spiritual

December 4, 2017 | 0 Comments

Two forms of patience reside in the believer–human and spiritual. The spiritual patience residing in every believer is the power of the God Himself! If that is so, then as long as you are in right relationship with God, the spirit of patience will control you. The question is not whether or not patience is available, but will you experience the patience that resides in you. Now we exhort you, brethren, warn those who are unruly, comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all.  1 Thessalonians 5:14 The focus in this passage is to be patient with all–not most. Do you need to learn more patience than you are currently experiencing? Most of us would say yes but we do not want to go through the process required to learn patience. Spiritual attributes described in Scripture, such as peace or patience, are different from how the world views the same attribute. While help may be gained from looking at both views, the Scripture has the supreme perspective. Jesus said in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.” The same is true of […] Read More

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